Strong leaders are good at building trust. To put it another way, “A leader is someone we want to follow”. That is easy to say, but how do we build that trust? Let’s think of the people in our lives we look up to. It is almost a sure bet that these people take the time to show a genuine interest in others. They are also excellent listeners. If we want to strengthen our trust with others and be better listeners, we can start by observing people who have developed this ability well.
Last week I was in the therapy pool at the health club. As I was doing my exercises, I heard a woman talk with great excitement about her past and future travels. As she was talking, an elderly woman entered the pool. The newcomer was quite old – my guest is she was nearly 100. She graciously engaged in conversation with the woman talking about her travels. The elderly woman had a wonderful smile that radiated her interest in listening to the “traveler”. She smiled, nodded, affirmed, and ask questions to learn and understand more. From her questions it was clear she had also done extensive travelling in her many years, yet in the 15 minutes of conversation with the traveler, the traveler never once asked the elderly woman anything about her experiences. If she had, she likely could have uncovered a wealth of valuable information that could help her plan her future travels. It was a one-sided conversation. The traveler showed no interest in the elderly lady. It was a missed opportunity.
If we want to be a strong leader, we need to make sure we show genuine interest in others. Get the other person to talk about their favorite suspect…themselves! (When was the last time you received a compliment for being a good listener?)
