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Category: Customer service
How to eliminate gossip in the workplace
Yes, you read it right! I said “eliminate”.
A few years ago I was working with a manufacturing team that wanted to be more productive. The first step was to have each participant do a self-assessment to help identify their personality and communication style. One of the team members was classified in the “Mediator” category. People in this group tend to be strong on harmony. “Let’s get along” is their motto. Richard, the business owner commented that he wished he had a whole team of “mediators”. “No, you don’t”, I replied. Why?
A Mediator wants to see everyone work together and get along. What’s the “flipside”? Mediators are usually very uncomfortable with conflict. There are times when we feel betrayed or simply disagree. If we don’t speak up, we can become frustrated and internalize our feelings. Unfortunately, doing this usually leads to us talking to someone else about our concern rather the person we should be talking to. This often leads to gossip, and gossip is not good for teamwork.
We all know the signs: When lunch break comes, certain clusters go off to another room. You know when your name is discussed because everyone gets quiet when you approach.
What do we do? Break the pattern. If someone has done or said something that has made it more difficult for you to do your job, speak up! Approach the person in a friendly way. Focus on the problem not the personality. Refrain from being judgmental. Relate the incident and how it affects your work. Seek common ground. In doing so, you will take an action step in creating a more positive working environment.
The power of simple language
Have you ever seen skywriting? Skywriters fly planes carrying banners with special messages on them. The message could be an ad or it might be a marriage proposal above a football stadium. Whatever the situation, you can bet that a high price is paid for each word. There may be a lesson here for all of us. The fewer words we use to communicate a thought or idea, the easier the message is to absorb. Here are some examples:
“at this point in time” change to “at this time”
“keep in mind that…” change to “remember that”
“held a meeting to discuss” change to “met to discuss”
“in the event that” change to “if”
“Until such time you are in a position to…” change to “when you are able to”
“Your check in the amout of $360” change to “your check for $360″
”
Keeping our communiation simple and direct allows us to be better understood and more likely to be influential
A professional approach that builds trust
Here’s a question for you: What is the difference between “nagging” and “gentle persistence”? I am not sure I have the exact answer. I do know that when someone nags me, I can get irritated, yet if they persist in a gentle and gracious way, I am much more motivated.
A couple years ago I sent an email to a person in a marketing company. He was doing a project for me, and I had something I wanted to add. When I wrote Jason, I forgot to copy the president – something which I had agreed to always do. A short time later, I received this email from the president:
“Hi Steve: Just a friendly reminder to “cc” me when requesting projects from the staff. I really don’t mind, but if I know they are working on a project for you, I won’t interrupt them with other projects if i can avoid it. Thanks, J
I was impressed. Not only was the approach friendly and respectful, she took the time to state the WIFM. (What’s in in for me) I was not upset by this email. Quite the contrary, I was upset with myself for the error of omission. I promised myself I would stick to my commitment and always “cc” the president. I have kept that commitment.
This was a good approach that received my full cooperation. What if the email had a nasty tone like “As mentioned previously, I expect a “cc” when…” The president chose the high road. She was probably irritated that I forgot, then quickly shifted to solving the problem. That’s professionalism!
When it is Ok to be “edgy”
When I decided to become a professional coach, I began a long training process that included numerous practicums I was either directly involved in or part of the audience. These practicums were in the form of role-playing, and I remember one time the person in the coaching role became a little “edgy” when working with his sample client. I thought the coach was going to be criticized for his edginess. Instead, he was praised. What? Here’s why: Good teachers, coaches, and parents know how to pull out the best in people. When your pupil is not giving his or her best, you are probably going to be frustrated or disappointed, and it shows up in your voice. I am not referring to a “nasty” tone. I mean “edgy”. There is a big difference. Here is an example:
A couple weeks ago I was in my garage, and noticed the lawn tractor lights had been left on. As a result, the battery was dead. My wife had been the last one to use the tractor, and I brought the situation to her attention. In he response, I could tell she was irritated. Later that day, I mentioned she had sounded edgy, and asked why. She said she did not like the way I approached her. I asked her what would have been a better approach. She told me. Problem solved.
When those we interact with appear tense, we can gently and tactfully ask them what is bothering them. Sometimes it is us, but other times it is not. They may have had a big argument with their kids or spouse that morning. We don’t know. We ask. If we are the source, we can make the adjustment. If we don’t, resentment can set it in, and teamwork and communication suffer.
Here is the message: If we are not happy with something, don’t be afraid to let it show a little in our voice. If we sense someone else is a little tense, find out why. We will strengthen teamwork and communication.
A must for a good first impression
Here is a situation I’ll bet we have all been in: We are at a party or social event and we meet someone. We say our name. They say theirs. We begin a conversation. A few seconds later we find ourselves in a minor panic because we have forgotten their name. We want to personalize the interaction by using their name. We can’t because we forgot it. Now what? We have two options: First, we can avoid calling them by name since we can’t remember it. If we do this, we run the risk of making the conversation stiff. Our second option is to ask the other person, “What was your name again?” This means we are admitting we weren’t listening. How does that work for making a good 1st impression?
It is an old cliche worth repeating, “There is no second chance to make a good first impression”. First impressions can easily make the difference in a sale. I once remember a top-producing salesperson say, “In most cases, I can predict the probability of the sale in the first five minutes.” Do you think learning and using a person’s name could be important in those first few minutes? It sure is! What can we do to helpus remember names better when being introduced or introducing ourselves? Here are some thoughts:
First, slow down when you first hear a name. Pretend like you are driving through a school zone. If you did not hear the name clearly, ask them to repeat it. The other person won’t be irritated. Their name is important to them, and they want people to get it right. With this added effort and focus, you will remember more names and help avoid having to admit you didn’t pay attention. And don’t try to be clever! Once I forgot a name, and I asked, “How do you spell your name?” There was a long pause and she replied, “SMITH“. Ouch! That exchange did not go so well.
Slow down, pay attention, remember names, and get off on the right foot.