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Category: Team Building
Be a resourceful leader
Many years ago I was working for a company that put a big emphasis on mentoring. As a senior account rep, I was approached by my supervisor (Bill) to mentor a team member who had just been hired. With my natural love of coaching, I eagerly agreed to take on the mentor assignment. The first thing I did was ask Bill, “What are the most important areas of professional development you would like me to focus on?” Bill replied with a predictable menu that included prospecting, tracking, learning specific terms, and sales language. Then Bill concluded with, “And I want you to work with him on the weekly forecast sheet we turn in every Monday.” I looked at Bill and saw a twinkle in his eye. I thought, “You son of a gun”. You see, I was not consistent at turning in my weekly forecast sheet. I knew that was going to change immediately if I wanted to lead by example – and I did. Bill knew it too. How sneaky! He tricked me! No, he didn’t. Bill was just being a resourceful leader. His delegation was well thought out. He designed it so that both me and person I was mentoring would grow.
Instead of nagging me about doing my report every week, Bill put me in a situation where I would naturally want to do it. I did become consistent with my reports and I didn’t feel manipulated. Bill created a “win-win”.
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Emotional intelligence starts with thinking right about people
Have you ever talked to an excellent customer service rep regarding a product or service-related problem? It is amazing how kind, caring and helpful a good rep can be. They must talk to their share of angry and irritating people, yet they have sense of equanimity about them that is fascinating. They have learned to “think right about people”, not take things personally, and focus on solving our problem.
When I was in my 20’s, I managed a property for a national lodging chain. I remember a specific customer we’ll call Mr. “K”. He was demanding, abrasive, and treated the front desk staff poorly. It wasn’t long before the team saw Mr. “K” as “persona non grata”. I could tell Mr. “K” was beginning to affect the morale of my staff, and decided to follow the philosophy of Mark Twain: “A sense of humor is a sense of proportion.”
I have always been good at impersonating others, and I developed a good impersonation of Mr. “K”. I captured his voice and mannerisms and began to act in character. I would wander around the front desk area with the stern look and intimidating voice of Mr. “K”. Each time I needed to tell the staff something or correct them on an error, I played Mr. “K”. The staff loved it, and we had a blast. I must admit that at first we were mocking him. Then a change occurred that we would not have predicted: We began to like Mr. “K” and looked forward to his visits. We were thinking good about him, and it showed up in our tone and facial expressions. This change in our thinking resulted in a change in our behavior. You see, abrasive people are not used to being treated kindly. Being nice to them can be disarming.
Mr. “K” became one of our favorite guests. He raved about our place and referred his friends to us. He was a walking commercial. The lesson here comes from author David J. Schwartz: We should “think right about people”. When we do, we strengthen relationships and become more influential.
Bullying: It’s not just for kids
If you are a parent, there usually comes a moment when your child needs to deal with a bully. I also believe that adults in the workplace must sometimes deal with a bully. According to the dictionary, a bully is, “A person who habitually seeks to harm or intimidate those who they perceive as vulnerable.” In other words, a bully is a coward, and they enjoy picking on someone who lets them. Please note the word enjoy.
I can truly say that I cannot recall allowing myself to be bullied in my childhood or adult life. Many have tried. I learned a valuable lesson early: Bullies like to bully, but only if it is a pleasant experience for them. My commitment was to make sure any bully who tried to pick on me would find the experience unpleasant and not worth repeating. We don’t need to be Chuck Norris, we just need to make sure that bullying us is not a pleasant experience
In adult life we can also be bullied. When someone says something mean to us, we can take a time out with that person and say, “You just said _______. I am not exactly sure what you meant by that. Please elaborate” I would politely and respectfully put them on the spot rather than absorb the hit. They soon got the message that bullying me was not going to be an experience worth repeating.
Many years ago, I was talking with a player on the Chicago Bears, and he mentioned he often had to face Walter Peyton in scrimmage. He said he dreaded having to tackle Walter Peyton. I said, “Gee, I thought he was a nice guy”. The player said, “He is. It just hurts to tackle him.” Tackling Walter Peyton was like trying to stop a ton of bricks. It wasn’t an experience you would want to repeat.
You may be a victim of bullying in the workplace or you may know someone who is. If so, do your best within good reason to make the bully not want to try again.
Developing good email “smarts”
Many years ago there was an aftershave commercial with the tagline: “Hai Karate…be careful how you use it!” When I think of the attributes of email, I often recall that aftershave commercial. Email is a tool, and like a hammer, you can use it to build a house or tear it down. In business, we want to build.
Responding quickly when appropriate: We have all been in a situation where we needed data, a model number, or a code to complete a task. We email someone who we know can help, and we appreciate it when they get right back to us. Downsde: Responding quickly to every email we receive could be a distraction, and affect our time management.
Send on Monday morning: A postal employee once told me that the best time to go to the post office is before 10am on Saturday. They were right! Likewise, here is the rule for sending an important email: Sent it out first thing Monday morning so that it will be at the top.
Using emoji’s: According to email strategist Emma Russell, emoji’s can give us a nice emotional spike, but they work best when sending them to people you know. “Using emoji’s with strangers can have unintended consequences.”
Question: When should we phone rather than email? That’s debatable. My rule of thumb: If someone is writing me an email and I can tell they are upset with me, my response would probably be two words”: “Let’s talk”
Five questions that can save you big time
Turnover is costly. Is that an understatement? How many times have we seen a treasured team member give their surprise two-week notice? In each case it is unlikely that the person leaving decided to do so that day.
Now let me ask you a question: Do you change the oil in your car regularly? Why? Your car is probably working fine. Why bother? It is called preventive maintenance. We value our car and want to keep it properly maintained for a long life.
How about our team members? What do we do to stay in step with them so they don’t give us a farewell? Here is a recommendation from Richard Finnegan, a consultant specializing in engagement and retention. In his book, “The Stay Interview”, he recommends we conduct one-on-one “stay interviews” at regular intervals with our staff members. Here are the five questions he recommends:
- When you come to work each day, what things do you look forward to?
- What are you learning here?
- Why do you stay here?
- When was the last time you thought about leaving our team? What prompted it?
- What can I do to make your experience at work better for you?
If we can do these interviews we can greatly reduce the frequency of those “surprise” resignations. Let’s practice good, regular, preventive maintenance with our team!